Those people closest to me know that for me to stop talking is rare. My mom says I started talking at around 10 months ("HI!" was my first word by the way) and haven't stopped since. When I was little she would ask me to give her ears a break. At this point in our relationship, Danny will tell you that I stop talking when I'm upset about something. But usually, that's about it.
So, when I say that "we" stopped talking I really mean that communication stopped. November was going along smoothly and we were planning on having Danny and his parents over to my parent's house for Thanksgiving dinner. By this point I had met his whole family (minus one brother and family) and he had met my whole family (minus my brother but including my grandparents).
A couple of days before Thanksgiving things just started becoming strange. Neither of us really know what happened. We were talking about the relationship progressing and moving towards marriage, and then--nothing. It made for a rather awkward Thanksgiving. A few days after that when I called, my call wasn't returned.
We had a little bit of a talk about how Danny was feeling. Now, mind you, when you meet Danny you don't really know him. If you meet him once, you can't say, "Oh, yeah. I know Danny." You can only say that you've met him. He's like an onion, or a cake, or a parfait even (note I said onion and not ogre!). He has layers upon layers upon layers. And he doesn't get close to just anyone. But he was starting to get close to me.
My pastor and I had talked about how I was doing during this whole first time dating thing and he recommended that Danny and I take about a week apart to pray and detox to see if we should continue with our relationship.
All of this was pretty much happening simultaneously. We had talked about how Danny was feeling. We had talked about Pastor Cody wanting us to take a break. So when we stopped talking, I thought maybe I was confused about when our break would start. I think I even asked Pastor Cody to email Danny and find out if we were on our prayer break or not. :) After the email, Danny called me and we talked for a little bit. Then he got sick within the next few days and I was working all the time. By now it was December and I was getting ready for Christmas.
I start my Christmas shopping early. I like to be done before November, but at least by December. So, I already had the perfect Christmas gift for Danny--something he had mentioned he wanted when we were at a store together. My mom had also spun and dyed some of his sheep wool and I had knit the yarn into a beanie. I was set for his Christmas presents.
Then there were no calls at all. Not even on Christmas. A few days after Christmas my family was in Bend returning stuff. We drove by his house and I dropped off all of the stuff that he had at my house: sunglasses, the beanie, and anything else that belonged to him. I took the other present back. He really didn't say much to me at all. He was mostly surprised to see me at his house.
We talked on the phone a few times after that. I gave him until January 11, 2010 to talk to me or make some effort in our relationship. He didn't know this was his deadline, but I had to set one or I would have let the break-up drag on even longer. By January 11th there was still no contact with him. I sent him a break-up email explaining how I felt. I ended it with something about being willing to be friends if he wanted. I didn't know that guys don't want to be "just friends"...but that's another story.
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